Integration
Copyright Elyana Aly 2024 All rights resserved
We (DHP) believe that integration and wholeness is possible and the right thing to do. We believe that the Creator, who gave His life into us, who created us, wants to restore us fully.
We believe that He wants to set every survivor free and put all of us back together to His original design.
We believe that DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) can be healed through integration. Amnestie walls can be broken and fall down, dissociation can be lifted, parts of the survivors humanity can be found, restored and integrated.
Integration is not only for “inner child work” but also for those with DID.
If you are affected and are looking for healing, please reach out to us.
We understand that integration can be scary and that there is lots of programming that keeps survivors away from integration. But we also know that programming can be broken and that He came to heal the broken hearted and to set the captives free.
Here is a little personal part of Ely’s integration story. We hope it will take away the fear of integration and will give you the hope you need to move forward in your own healing journey.
Please always feel free to contact us.
~*Integration of a very strong and much loved teenage part*~
My younger me (part) and I sat together inside (in our inner world) for a while.
She smiled. She was so ready. I wasn’t.
She told me that she lived the life long enough in separation, but that there’s nothing else she could teach me any longer, that she feels that she is no longer strengthen the system, but weakening it. And that she is so ready and happy to be integrated, to walk into her and our freedom.
I told her, that I am not.
She asked me if I would ever be ready… I felt a no… and I understood her non-spoken question.
And she just nodded her head- asking me- and how exactly does it feel? I started to cry more and said- it feels like integrating you will be the beginning of the end.
And she just came closer, hugged me, smiled and said- yes! Thats it. That’s the truth. Having me integrated will be the beginning of the end. The end of dissociation, the end of separation, the end of being many, being shattered into so many pieces!
We all feel it for months now- that there is an end. That we’re so much closer to the end, the end of separation, the end of horror, the end of being accessed. The beginning of more freedom.
We all feel it. And the darkness knows it too. That’s why they are trying so hard to get us again, to push us back, to discourage us, that’s why they are chasing us, chasing our family, why they hurt the body so much and everyone we love. They know that they lost us, but they are totally afraid of us being totally free and strong. You know that Ely, we all know that. And integrating me- as one of the core parts will be the „beginning of the end“. Isn’t that wonderful?
I couldn’t say anything but cry.
So she asked me again- isn’t it wonderful that it is the beginning of the end? Don’t you want this kind of end?
And I screamed at her saying- NO!! I don’t want the end! It feels wrong. It feels so wrong.
She hugged me closer and asked me to describe my feelings to that…
I answered: hatred, fear, betrayal, overwhelm, abandonment, lost, forlorn, helplessness, hopelessness, heartache, despair, anxiety, nervousness, failure, rejection, grief, sorrow, worry, sadness, anger, bitterness, guilt, depression, panic, horror, terror, conflict, shame, shock, unworthy, worthless… a mixture of all of these and even more I couldn’t name at all.
And she just hold me closer and whispered- but Ely- those are not your feelings, especially not in this intensity. These are projected weaponised emotions- the darkness wants you to feel that. They want you to be overpowered and beaten up by this feelings.
They want you to give up and to believe that the whole freedom, our wholeness, our complete integration isn’t really wanted from you, is nothing we really go for any longer. They want you to give up!! Those feelings are weapons from them to beat you. You know that… please let’s get rid of them.
She invited Y’shua as the Lion of the tribe of Judah to come closer to uns, He was right there with us and she asked me - Ely, my love, would you give those feelings to Him? He wants to take all of those, they are not yours, they are not from Him. Would you give them to Him?
And looking in the loving eyes of our Lion I asked Him to take them from me and He took everything that was just a weapon from the darkness. I felt so much more peace, more clarity.
And she hugged me again very tight and said- You want this integration Ely. Maybe nobody here wants it so baldy like you do. You are fighting for so so so long already and you will not give up now. Because it is exactly what you want- the total freedom, our wholeness, everything for His glory. He paid it all. He finished it and we will run this race until the end. You will go until He will look into your eyes and until He will say „It is done. Well done.“ It’s for Him and His glory. You want this. And you will go for this until the end.
We talked a bit more but we finally stood up for the „final hug“ of integration. Y’shua directly at our side… the moment I thought she will be integrated and „gone“, she jumped back and while I was wondering if she now decided different and for some reason doesn’t want the integration any longer, she just smiled more and was waving with a crown in her hand. Smiling she said- This is my crown, Ely… Y’shua once gave it to me, when I was fighting so hard and couldn’t love myself at all, when I doubted there is anything good in me and that I will ever be able to do something for His kingdom. He gave it to me, telling me that I am crowned with His glory. That I am His forever, that He is proud of me, His warrior girl. That He loves me, my faith and me fighting against the darkness… and that I am endlessly precious to Him. I am crowned with His glory. And now I give it to you, because it is yours, you are me and I am you. You are crowned with His glory Ely. And nothing the darkness ever did to us can change that. Because He loved us first. He had the first claim and He chose us. We are His. We are crowned with His glory. We are His warrior girls. You are His. You belong to Him, forever. This crown belongs to you.
She put the crown on my head and went into her freedom, right in me.
After a while I stopped crying. Y’shua asked me- How does it feel? And I answered- I miss her and I probably will feel that for a while but she’s not gone… she’s right here, inside of me.
I took the crown and wanted to give it back to Yshua. He smiled and said- no! This one is yours! And I said-no you gave it to her, my younger, stronger part of me. He looked at me- full with love and compassion and asked- Ely, would you have taken it out of my hands? And I starred at Him and said: Of course NOT! And He said- I am the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the Alpha and the Omega, I am the Creator of the World, the Truth, the Way, The Life, the Light… I am your everything… but nevertheless you would refuse My gift, My crown of My glory for you, because you dont feel worthy to receive anything. It needed your younger you, your younger part to give you my gift. She was you, she is you. And she was ready to receive my gift for her and you so she could hand it over to you, when you will give her back her freedom of integration.
This crown is yours. You are crowned with My glory. Don’t give up. Run the race, I am here- right with you. And you are an overcomer. You are my warrior. And you are so loved and precious.
And today…
I know she’s still here, integrated in me.
When I take a deep breath- I can feel the warrior girl in me standing up, getting ready for the next battle.
No! The darkness can not have me, the darkness cannot have us. Because Jesus, the Lion of the Tribe of Judah paid it all and He already has the victory! It is finished!
We believe that He wants to set every survivor free and put all of us back together to His original design.
We believe that DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) can be healed through integration. Amnestie walls can be broken and fall down, dissociation can be lifted, parts of the survivors humanity can be found, restored and integrated.
Integration is not only for “inner child work” but also for those with DID.
If you are affected and are looking for healing, please reach out to us.
We understand that integration can be scary and that there is lots of programming that keeps survivors away from integration. But we also know that programming can be broken and that He came to heal the broken hearted and to set the captives free.
Here is a little personal part of Ely’s integration story. We hope it will take away the fear of integration and will give you the hope you need to move forward in your own healing journey.
Please always feel free to contact us.
~*Integration of a very strong and much loved teenage part*~
My younger me (part) and I sat together inside (in our inner world) for a while.
She smiled. She was so ready. I wasn’t.
She told me that she lived the life long enough in separation, but that there’s nothing else she could teach me any longer, that she feels that she is no longer strengthen the system, but weakening it. And that she is so ready and happy to be integrated, to walk into her and our freedom.
I told her, that I am not.
She asked me if I would ever be ready… I felt a no… and I understood her non-spoken question.
And she just nodded her head- asking me- and how exactly does it feel? I started to cry more and said- it feels like integrating you will be the beginning of the end.
And she just came closer, hugged me, smiled and said- yes! Thats it. That’s the truth. Having me integrated will be the beginning of the end. The end of dissociation, the end of separation, the end of being many, being shattered into so many pieces!
We all feel it for months now- that there is an end. That we’re so much closer to the end, the end of separation, the end of horror, the end of being accessed. The beginning of more freedom.
We all feel it. And the darkness knows it too. That’s why they are trying so hard to get us again, to push us back, to discourage us, that’s why they are chasing us, chasing our family, why they hurt the body so much and everyone we love. They know that they lost us, but they are totally afraid of us being totally free and strong. You know that Ely, we all know that. And integrating me- as one of the core parts will be the „beginning of the end“. Isn’t that wonderful?
I couldn’t say anything but cry.
So she asked me again- isn’t it wonderful that it is the beginning of the end? Don’t you want this kind of end?
And I screamed at her saying- NO!! I don’t want the end! It feels wrong. It feels so wrong.
She hugged me closer and asked me to describe my feelings to that…
I answered: hatred, fear, betrayal, overwhelm, abandonment, lost, forlorn, helplessness, hopelessness, heartache, despair, anxiety, nervousness, failure, rejection, grief, sorrow, worry, sadness, anger, bitterness, guilt, depression, panic, horror, terror, conflict, shame, shock, unworthy, worthless… a mixture of all of these and even more I couldn’t name at all.
And she just hold me closer and whispered- but Ely- those are not your feelings, especially not in this intensity. These are projected weaponised emotions- the darkness wants you to feel that. They want you to be overpowered and beaten up by this feelings.
They want you to give up and to believe that the whole freedom, our wholeness, our complete integration isn’t really wanted from you, is nothing we really go for any longer. They want you to give up!! Those feelings are weapons from them to beat you. You know that… please let’s get rid of them.
She invited Y’shua as the Lion of the tribe of Judah to come closer to uns, He was right there with us and she asked me - Ely, my love, would you give those feelings to Him? He wants to take all of those, they are not yours, they are not from Him. Would you give them to Him?
And looking in the loving eyes of our Lion I asked Him to take them from me and He took everything that was just a weapon from the darkness. I felt so much more peace, more clarity.
And she hugged me again very tight and said- You want this integration Ely. Maybe nobody here wants it so baldy like you do. You are fighting for so so so long already and you will not give up now. Because it is exactly what you want- the total freedom, our wholeness, everything for His glory. He paid it all. He finished it and we will run this race until the end. You will go until He will look into your eyes and until He will say „It is done. Well done.“ It’s for Him and His glory. You want this. And you will go for this until the end.
We talked a bit more but we finally stood up for the „final hug“ of integration. Y’shua directly at our side… the moment I thought she will be integrated and „gone“, she jumped back and while I was wondering if she now decided different and for some reason doesn’t want the integration any longer, she just smiled more and was waving with a crown in her hand. Smiling she said- This is my crown, Ely… Y’shua once gave it to me, when I was fighting so hard and couldn’t love myself at all, when I doubted there is anything good in me and that I will ever be able to do something for His kingdom. He gave it to me, telling me that I am crowned with His glory. That I am His forever, that He is proud of me, His warrior girl. That He loves me, my faith and me fighting against the darkness… and that I am endlessly precious to Him. I am crowned with His glory. And now I give it to you, because it is yours, you are me and I am you. You are crowned with His glory Ely. And nothing the darkness ever did to us can change that. Because He loved us first. He had the first claim and He chose us. We are His. We are crowned with His glory. We are His warrior girls. You are His. You belong to Him, forever. This crown belongs to you.
She put the crown on my head and went into her freedom, right in me.
After a while I stopped crying. Y’shua asked me- How does it feel? And I answered- I miss her and I probably will feel that for a while but she’s not gone… she’s right here, inside of me.
I took the crown and wanted to give it back to Yshua. He smiled and said- no! This one is yours! And I said-no you gave it to her, my younger, stronger part of me. He looked at me- full with love and compassion and asked- Ely, would you have taken it out of my hands? And I starred at Him and said: Of course NOT! And He said- I am the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the Alpha and the Omega, I am the Creator of the World, the Truth, the Way, The Life, the Light… I am your everything… but nevertheless you would refuse My gift, My crown of My glory for you, because you dont feel worthy to receive anything. It needed your younger you, your younger part to give you my gift. She was you, she is you. And she was ready to receive my gift for her and you so she could hand it over to you, when you will give her back her freedom of integration.
This crown is yours. You are crowned with My glory. Don’t give up. Run the race, I am here- right with you. And you are an overcomer. You are my warrior. And you are so loved and precious.
And today…
I know she’s still here, integrated in me.
When I take a deep breath- I can feel the warrior girl in me standing up, getting ready for the next battle.
No! The darkness can not have me, the darkness cannot have us. Because Jesus, the Lion of the Tribe of Judah paid it all and He already has the victory! It is finished!
